Sometimes we need a break. Am I right? Being an adult just suck’s sometimes. I mean for real. There are some days I wish I could go back to my teenage years; no, my childhood years. To not have to worry about life! We’re trying to balance it all. Work, school, marriage, bills, deadlines, kids, activities, appointments, church, volunteering, the many birthday parties for your kids (I mean really), the cleaning, the laundry and the effort to get you and all the other humans in your house ready every day. It takes a lot of effort and a lot of showing up. Maybe it’s just me, but some days it all can feel overwhelming, and most days we don’t even think about our busy lives because that is all we know. Don’t get me wrong, I, on most days enjoy doing what I need to do for my family. But some days, those few days where you are over the tantrums, the spilled drinks, the mess at the table, the silly requests you get at work, the drama from work, the due dates, the papers for school, and all the other stuff we juggle we feel tired and overwhelmed. Don’t let those few days get the best of you. Sometimes we need a break. And guess what, you’re not the only one who has ever felt this way. And that’s okay.
The busier I was the more needed I felt. At one point in my 20’s I had 3 jobs and doing all the other stuff minus the kids. I got so caught up in having all these things define me I forgot to take time for myself. I was giving all of me and my time to others thinking that that was necessary. I was serving my family, my church, my job and the community around me. What about me though? Who was doing anything for me? More importantly, what was I doing for me? Some of you may be good at taking time for yourself (please help a girl out 😊) I am a bit envious. I on the other hand forget about me, a lot. It might be because I don’t really do mani/pedi’s so I don’t think about going. I always tell myself, you need a massage, a facial, or go to the spa but it is just a thought that never goes anywhere, and sometimes money is tight, right? If I go to the mall or the infamous Target I end up spending too much money because I just can’t resist so I try to avoid going. I don’t like to spend all day shopping. And I’ll be honest I am terrible at calling someone up to just hang out with them, get a change of scenery. But thank you God for an amazing husband and some awesome friends that make these types of plans for me, lol.
It has only been through this past year that I realized I needed to do more for myself. Even if it’s taking a couple of hours in the day going to Ikea, Container Store, Consignment/Antique stores or Hobby Lobby (these places speak to me, idk). Take the time to get refreshed however that looks for you. As I write this I am on a plane to Phoenix, AZ with my husband Isaac. This is the first time leaving both kids for more than one night since Graecia was born, it’s 5 nights! For weeks leading up to today I was dreading leaving them. Especially my 9-month-old. She is with me every day; all day and I am up with her on those special nights she doesn’t want to sleep 😉. And Lincoln, he’s my sidekick. We have a special understanding for each other. I am the over-thinker and all too often let my thoughts run wild. I think, what if something happens while we are gone, to us or to them. Do we have a plan for them, God forbid anything should happen? Y’all my mind goes there! And then to the rescue my husband, Isaac always reminds me that it’s all going to be okay. And I repent for the thoughts I have (remember, it’s an everyday battle. Read my post The Struggle is Real).
Learn to Treat yo’ self. If you’ve ever watched Parks and Rec, the characters Tom Haverford and Donna Meagle created a day to do exactly that. Pamper yourself. Do the things that you want, the things you enjoy, the things that make you happy, the things that get you refreshed. Whether it be going on a trip, buying a special gift for yourself, treating yourself to the spa, having coffee or tea with your special crew. Whatever it is, Treat yo’ self. I have found that doing things with others is even more refreshing and rewarding to our souls than doing it by ourselves. We all need a time of refreshing. A time to ourselves to see God’s fullness in us, and in Him. Maybe taking a trip is too much right away. But can I tell you that sometimes it is necessary. I went on my first ‘girls’ trip last year and was completely revitalized. Yes, I missed my kids and husband. Yes, I thought about them. Yes, I was going through the day trying not to nag my husband reminding him about things he already knows. I made it appoint to focus on the purpose of being gone. To be with my other family. It was so relaxing. I got to enjoy the spa 😊, go running, did some yoga and take each day as it came without having to plan out every minute. I also got to spend time with God, being in another city enjoying His creation outside of my everyday environment. It was this trip that I finally told God, okay, I won’t run anymore. Thus, the beginning of this journey I am now on writing to you all every week.
We need to be more forgiving of ourselves. So, don’t you dare feel guilty about doing something for you. Yes, you might miss your kids, yes you must release the control and let someone else help, yes you must make the necessary arrangements to be gone. It might help to start out with a couple of hours, working yourself into a day or even a trip with close friends or your spouse (don’t forget you need time with your spouse, a topic for another time). But gosh it is so needed and sometimes necessary. God satisfies our souls. He refreshes our spirit. Find whatever it is that will refresh yourself and be intentional about doing that. I hope you find grace with yourself and treat yo’ self when you can.